Hot Mess:
2025 in a nutshell, but also a bakery!
Rustic bakes for the discerning and not-so-discerning eater. Chicago-based, European-inspired, globally-influenced.
Additional information
Important info
We strive for quality, using Land O Lakes butter or better, pasture-raised or local eggs, pasture-raised milk, pure vanilla, as well as other fine ingredients. However, there may be rare occasions when pricing or availability requires that we stray from these ideals (but only temporarily!).
Hot Mess Bakery uses an apartment kitchen as its production facility. As such, we cannot guarantee that baked goods will not come into contact with nuts, gluten, dairy, or other ingredients which could cause allergic reactions. See "Ingredient substitutions" for more info on requesting gluten-free, vegan, and other special dietary options.
Timing, shipping, pickup, and delivery
Please let me know the timeframe in which you hope to receive your order. I will do the best I can to accommodate, but I will be balancing my baking workload and my work schedule. The basic principle of first-come, first-served will guide my scheduling, when necessary.
Shipping is via prepaid USPS Priority Mail boxes. We use the smallest size and the smallest number of boxes we can, but don't want to crowd or smoosh your items, either.
Medium boxes: $19.30
Large boxes: $26.00
Pickup can be arranged at my apartment in Lincoln Square. Delivery to areas on the North Side of Chicago may be possible; please contact us to discuss details.
Ingredient substitutions
Substitutions are possible--some are easier than others and affect recipes less than others. Please inquire about alternative flours, dairy-free, nut-free, vegan, and other options. Additional charges will apply.
Should you have any questions about our products, please contact me, and I will be happy to share the full ingredient list.
Custom orders
I love to bake and try new recipes--what you see on the menu above is by no means all I am capable of baking! Please reach out with your custom order requests, and I will work with you to come up with some bakes to satisfy your needs, tastes, and budget.
How to order
Instructions
Please include your name, email, phone number, items requested, timeframe requested, and any special requests when placing your order.
By text/phone
773-669-6397
By email
By contact form
Scroll down to the next section to use the contact form to submit your order.
Contact form
Why "Hot Mess"?
As a recovering addict and alcoholic (now with many years of continuous sobriety), I spent many years as a human hot mess. Our bakery's name is a humorous reference to surviving those days, as well as our baking philosophy that taste trumps appearance (e.g., I neither like nor am good at fussy frosting, chocolate, and fondant decorations). We'd much rather offer tasty baked goods that look a little messy than items that look perfect but are sickly sweet or unbalanced in flavor.
Hot Mess Bakery is a division of Argonaut LLC (aka something else Jason does). Our parent company offers bespoke public policy research, analysis, and communications consulting services, with particular expertise in climate and energy issues.